Week 3

Week 3!
So things dont seem to be working out as well as I thought they would so my 2 month vacation here is being cut short to one so i only have one week left, but hell I've been here for a effin month. How many people can say they've had a freaking month long vacation in Hawaii?
ANYWAYS. One more week to LIVE IT UP on the ISLANDDDDDDDDDD.

Gon fakkin miss this place

But yea. Made many frands.

 A gecko, his name is Steve

This is a baby so chubby he sleeps on his own cheeks like they're pillows.

Lol, besides the reptile and infant I've met some amazing friends here. Met up with my friend Brittany, who I've never seen in over 3 years and caught up and it was wonderful. Became friends with her friend, Christine and her CRAZY cool mom. Oh yea... and became family to a pick-up truck full of Tongans WHOOWHOOOO

Anywho, sorry for being a lazy bum and not putting up week 3 sooner!

Teehee Polynesian store, you crazy

Oh wow, honey look how small they make the beach look. JK I <3 you two lmaooo (u know i b hideous)

But seriously, reasons for leaving aside, I really am going to miss this place so freaking much. Seriously when I get all rich and famous, Ima buy err' one out here a house in Hawaii Kai, promises. XD

On my way to the bus stop after staying over at Brittanny's house. AHAH suburbia is still everywhere even in Hawaii.

Little boxes, little boxes made of tiki taki...

This is Ala Moana's food court, yea we're really good friends now. ITS LIKE A FAT DISNEY WORLD

Friday Night Fun.

So my friend Christine's mom is the freaking best. She knows everyone on the island and comps me a free pass into a cool club Zanzabar (like freaking 30$ for under 21's) as we hit Waikiki.

Oh hai there... Oh wait you want to take me out on a night @ Waikiki, how kind of you

lmao handed this to me on the way out of the club.

Lmao ok if you wanna know more about the nights festivities just ask me lol. Not going to really divulge much but yea this little boy did make a few singles XD.

Some random dude's grad party.... 

So yes, the family is invited to someone's graduation party for getting their grad degree blah blah blah, I come too... planning to go out later anyways. Yea... if you were there and knew what happened good for you, but my lips are sealed lol.

Baby and her chill mom 'Tilda. He be so swag in his red lexus lmao

She's going to dance for money.... literally

I had better pictures but seeing as these people are kinda like this all the time, I thought it would be the best to capture them in their beautiful hideousness.

From right to left: Tilda, Anne, Some random cow I don't know, Ema, Fusi, and some 15 year old punk i think her name is Lupe

 ChinaFREAKINGtown

                                                     

Something in this picture doesn't belong.... like a bull in a CHINAshop GET IT?! China shop, chinatown?! sigh...

Our voyage to Vagina Cliff

So in Hawaiian, Pali means cliff, but in Tongan it means pussy. YAY

So as we go off to visit pali look out look out we stop by to get fat:

I love being fat

The wild chickens of vagina cliff

apparently hawaiians use random ass rocks as gravestones so its bad luck to ever touch one, like any random one cuz you might just get a ghost haunting you!

The thing about Pali look out is that its is windy... Like one of the windiest places on the island. The world record for motor-less flight was done here. You had to grab onto things and try to climb your way up at certain times. I'm just glad we went on a relatively tame day.

the wind was so strong it kept you up when u bent over!

I present to you, the king of derp

I climb things

Week 3 done!

Week 2

Vengeance of the fats.

You guys have no idea, Hawaii has THE BEST 7-11's. Seriously they have sushi rolls that you make your self, or SPAM FREAKING MUSUBI. It's like hawaiin metaphor for kimbab. Got a field trip or a game your going to? Musubi. Sleep over? Musubi. SO. GOOD. I DIE.

No you have no idea, the people at the 7-11 already know my face. I've gone 3 times a day before, yea I'm not ashamed of it.

Seriously, if only the mainland 7's (what people out here refer 7-11 as) didn't suck and had things like this here. They have manapua, which is some meat bun (koreans have something like it called Ho-ppang. And best of all they have make it your self sushi rolls. So far my favorite have been crab california rolls and spicy ahi.

Step 1. Procure said sexinyourmouth roll

Step 2. Unwrap first fold of nori (seaweed).

Step 3. Set free the rice.

Step 4. The tricky part of rolling the rice onto the exposed nori then rolling it all the way down the now naked nori.

Done!

Oh look, my two favorite things.

LE MALL

Ala Moana, the largest outdoor mall in the United States. 

No seriously, look @ the aerial view, its the flatter white portion. courtesy of google images. You know Polynesians always do it big.

So the troupe and I decide to check out Waikiki beach because, well I am a tourist after all it's my duty to go there. But before going there of course we have to stop by the biggest mall I've ever been in, Ala Moana. 

To get there form Waimanalu, you of course have to hop on the bus. And funny enough that's what its called, "The Bus", Hawaii likes the literal for its transportation services apparently.

"The Ladies Recline"

3254x1952 pixels, 8-mp lens, natural lighting, Photographer: D. Chung. 

This is actually the second time I've stepped in but this time I took pictures. Fortune smiles upon you.

Stupid kid ruined my shot

WAIKIKI BEACH

So here are some really nice shots from the beach. It really is a visually stunning beach.

 Everyday they're tourin'

 perky

 Fusi, the eldest.

 Anne is not a happy tourist...

 Ana and I were the only ones who went out to swim, look how little we are.

 GET DA FUK OUT MY PICTURE YOU LITTLE CU-

Better

Now that you've seen how pretty it is, I can now happily tell you the bad. It was disgusting to swim in. Waikiki in known to be avoided by all the locals for this reason. In the colonial times it was a rice patty (asian throwbacks) and in the 90's it was on the hawaiin news for being the dirtiest beach. Charming.

That rock wall Ana and I were on? yea its a barrier so tender pussy foot hotel goers don't get bruised, but it just magnifies how warm it is. It was a comfortable urine temperature and smelt like fish... gross. I learnt my lesson and the family told me to stick to Waimanlu beaches, even Obama goes there for his vacay's at Kailua.

Let's get Lei'd

So mama Ta'ufo'ou runs a little business making Tongan lei's for the folks round here and they fetch a pretty penny at the cost of family/child labor, hey no family's perfect.

But they have BUCKET fulls of flowers just for making leis...

Bellows Beach

So learning from Waikiki, the fam brings me to Bellows Beach, it's in between Waimanalu beach and Kailua (remember Obama-land?)

 The transit, the back of the pick up. Never gets old

 I actually had no idea that we were both doing this at the same time.

In which I get smashed by a wave.

Anywho, this is my adventure so far, tmmrw's a national holiday and a Friday... WE SO EXCITEDDD. I bare a herp derp picture of me, in which I look slightly impaired while completely sober... how gracious.

-the dark one.